Posts Tagged ‘divine feminine; empowering women; wonder woman; evolution; role models; truth telling; speaking your truth; letting go of perfection; authenticity; equality; diversity;’

Start by creating powerful conversations within you

Hello you, welcome to THE most important conversation you will have today, an empowering conversation with you. Are you ready to take an inward journey?

Before, you dive in I want to share these insights with you:

  1. Saying yes to creating powerful, meaningful and empowering conversations is a daily choice. It requires practice, a beginner’s mind (because every day is a new start) and trust (bucket loads of it). 
  2. It requires a curiosity to go deeper than surface chatter and perhaps you are curious about who you are and the meaning of your life? 
  3. A level of understanding of how you show up when you feel empowered and how you behave when you feel triggered is helpful but it doesn’t replace a willingness to keep starting over because that is what an introspective practice looks like. What happened yesterday is technically, old news. 
  4. It requires you to believe in you, to know you are worthy of taking up space and being heard because you have something to contribute. Ultimately, it’s about discovering your inner voice and speaking words that matter to you, these words can be used as a way to connect and disconnect, where need be. You do not need to be part of every conversation, so make your choices clearly and remember, the word “no” is a full sentence.

Why this matters?

If you create the space and tune into your inner voice, all other conversations can flow from this place. It’s easier when you listen deeply to yourself and build in space to check-in. And you can more readily hear the (often unspoken) needs of others.

For example, one of your colleagues volunteers for a new project but you sense that there is a need to lighten her/his load. You fear making an incorrect judgement, what she/he is saying sounds positive and yet, there is an alarm bell ringing. You spend some time reconnecting to yourself and realise that you have a longing to support her/him to see if more work is the true requirement. This is when you take your next step and hold your second powerful conversation).

The more you connect and honour your feelings, the greater the trust between you and you. If you are not in fear then what is possible for you, what quality is available? You can check-in by asking: If I wasn’t experiencing fear right now, what would I do?

Making space to breathe supports awareness of what is happening and needed, this is your way out and through.

When you realise your strength and power, it’s hard to feel compromised by others or situations that are out of your control. It’s also easier to feel connected too. Every time you check in with yourself and choose to unhook from limiting self-talk, it’s a big personal win. Focusing on your inner needs, mental health and wellbeing will support you to express who you are and embody your highest potential.

So I invite you to take five minutes today to tune into your heart and breathe in, and out. Check-in with your feelings at the beginning, midway and end. What are you noticing? Has your mood improved? 

Tune into next week’s blog during Mental Health Awareness Week (UK) and I will share my mini roadmap on how to start a powerful inward conversation.

This blog is part of a Powerful Conversations series written by Karen Heras-Kelly, which includes the following articles: 

  • Building bridges one conversation at a time
  • Listen to reconnect
  • Now is the time for leaders to recover to self
  • When I say Powerful Conversation, you assume?
  • Make your dreams bigger than your limiting beliefs

You can catch up on the full series at https://www.atribecalledwoman.com/category/blog/ Karen is a Certified Professional Co-Active Coach, Leadership facilitator, meditation and creative visualisation expert. Karen is the founder of A Tribe Called Woman and the Breathe Time at work project.

The pain under the smile

Yesterday my inner peace was shattered in my front yard. We had spent most of the day in the garden enjoying the sunshine together as a family. Life was in the slow lane and we were all woozy from the heat. Walking into the front garden, we were alarmed by an ambulance and two police cars.

What are you hungry for…?

In my work as a coach, I never know what new topics will come to the table when I work with clients. And yet one essential ingredient is being able to listen with the intention of opening up new possibilities for them, even if this is simply the development of a new perspective.

When I say powerful conversation, you assume…?

This is my fourth article in my Powerful Conversations series and writing it has really got me thinking, in a good way. I’m reflected on some of my recent powerful conversations and realised that these often rise from a place of challenge or a desire for change. There is a definite pull towards a set outcome and change I’m committed to. 

At this point, I’ve tuned into my intuition or inner knowing and I’m following a path that will see me create a space to speak, listen, feel, agree or disagree and then (hopefully) build a new agreement. Or at the very least, agree to reflect and reconnect with the idea of a new outcome next time.  I realise that conversations feel transformational even if the end goal is a long way away because investing time to be with another human feels good when I move from an open heart and mind.

Often when we approach a powerful conversation we have already made our mind how it will be:

This is all very nice so far isn’t it. But here’s the thing, often when we approach a powerful conversation we have already made our mind how it will be, what we will experience, how we will feel and if it will be a success. Feelings like stress, dread, trepidation can overtake what is really happening in the moment and diminish the opportunity to be seen, heard and understood from all sides. What if the biggest gift you could give to someone today was to say, “I’ve never thought of it like that, that’s really interesting, thank you for sharing.”

Breaking free of the old mould:

Without taking time to reflect, often we have framed the conversation in a certain way, based upon our own life experiences and through automatic lenses or a rigid perspective. I hear these words a lot, “I really hate confrontation, which automatically creates an assumption that the conversation will be difficult and painful.” When you show up from this place, it’s likely that you will appear defensive, rigid and closed, and it will show in your face, words and body language.

This is where the commitment to sustainable change becomes essential because without this approach, a resonate outcome for all will be hard to reach. It requires some inner processing and clarity because you are required to both stand in your own shoes and adopt a resonant perspective, as well as see the world through different eyes, only then are you freed up to truly listen and create. 

Karen’s work as a Certified leadership facilitator, coach and visualisation expert empowers you to have high level, powerful and expansive conversations.

Let me give you an example…

If I invited you to engage in a powerful conversation with me how would you feel? What would your first (automatic) response be? What would you assume about me, the conversation and its impact on you? Most importantly, would you be open to the experience?

It is true to say that nearly all humans I have ever met (including myself) have some kind of issue with the idea of power, they want more of it, they fear it, they dislike it, they rebel against it and so on.

Several years ago, I taught at my local university within the faculty of business and law, and asked students across two classes to bring examples of powerful campaigns in for discussion. Their response astounded me, every student from a class of 45 translated the word powerful negatively collecting images focused around nicotine, cancer, war etc. But hope was not totally lost, as one student showcased a different perspective on powerful. Her story communicated the positive impact loving your body (regardless of its outer form) can have on self-esteem. 

BUT the real takeaway from this article is this:

What if the request for a powerful conversation could be a spark that lit you and others up from the inside? What if my intention was to tell you what I saw in you, how you made me feel and how much I valued our relationship? 

These words stand as an invitation to create some space for heart-warming (and powerful) conversations with others – because who said that all powerful conversation need to be steeped in negative conflict? What if this could be a whole hearted and glorious experience for all, now that’s a wonderful perspective to adopt?

Here’s a few tips to get you started:

  • Before you dive in take some time to clear your assumptions and choose a perspective that excites you and makes you feel alive.
  • Then reflect on their impact on you, how they make you feel and what they bring to your day/week etc? 
  • When you think of this person or the topic that you would like to discuss, what do you feel, what do you believe and what do you want them to take away? By accessing your own feelings, you can really bring the conversation to life and that’s very exciting.
  • Then step into the circle, and honour their contribution – making sure you pay close attention to your own impact as you do so?

This blog is part of a Powerful Conversations series written by Karen Heras-Kelly. Karen is a Certified Professional Co-Active Coach, Leadership facilitator, meditation and creative visualisation expert. Karen is the founder of A Tribe Called Woman and the Breathe Time at work project.

Give yourself permission to feel your feelings without judgement

Today, I celebrated myself. I was able to feel stressed and anxious while also being aware of an outpouring of love. My daughter became sick very quickly and the strength of love in my heart and witnessing the love from my parents towards us, opened my heart. I cried tears of love – it was a moment of recollection, of deep gratitude, of coming home to myself and the truth about how loved we are.

Welcome

Whatever is present in your life, welcome it. Whatever you have, welcome it. Choose not to turn your face away, reject what has been given, no matter how harsh or unworthy you deem it or them to currently be.

My story of wellbeing in COVID times…

My story of wellbeing in COVID times… This is a blog about self-reflections, awareness and acknowledgment. It has been written as a bridge of light for anyone who is feeling lost, alone and unsure of their next step. It also provides a healthy boost if you are committed to making an ongoing journey back home to your true self.

Waking up from the neck down

We’ve been sold a dud, led astray if you may by philosophers, psychologists and prophets. Teachings have told us that body is unimportant, yes it’s important to stay healthy and fit, but mind is the king and body the lesser queen or perhaps the sckully maid.

If it’s anything other than love, you are at war…

What does a white woman know of racism? I’m surprised to say, I know more than I realise. Last week set off a time bomb in my inner world, a vibration which was slow to start began growing, a small ember took hold and the heat started to build. Some of the stories in this blog have surprised me because they have been lying dormant for a long time, but as I wrote, memories of times where I experienced racism and sexual discrimination flooded in.

What we can all learn about Megxit – a Certified Coach’s perspective

I have found myself gripped by Megxit the last few days and as a Certified Coach and Communications Expert of 23 years, I believe this situation is one that offers a lot of learning for us in all areas of our life, especially in the workplace… This blog is dedicated to creating real-life conversations at work, however it can be used in any area of conflict that may be happening in your life right now… Here goes.

Why I no longer aspire to be Wonder Woman or any other pseudo-female

Who did you look up to when you were a child and what does this choice reveal to you? Who inspires you today and what’s the deeper meaning of those you follow? My childhood role model was Wonder Woman because I aspired to her beauty, intelligence and power. As an adult, I see a feminine warrior, fighting for justice from a place of compassion and heart, so it’s easy to understand why she had an impact on me. I also see the damage done by this outdated notion that women have to be and have it all, beautifully poised and groomed while fighting on the right side of the law.

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